EP 223: Naked Life Story – Shelley

Stuck on repeat and sure that she would lose everything, today’s guest decided she needed to make a change. Subscribe to This Naked Mind on YouTube - https://goo.gl/ZJQAZ8.

Annie welcomes Shelley, who has been alcohol free for over 2 years now! But before her life-changing decision that brought her freedom, things were quickly spiraling out of control. Find out how an alcohol-dependent dad, party-prone friends, and a near-fatal accident all contributed to the life that she ultimately decided to leave behind.

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When I graduated from undergrad, I moved to Chicago. The reason I actually went is for a boy. I followed a guy who I thought would be the answers to all my problems. It didn't end up working out.

I had a fairly healthy relationship while I was in Chicago for a couple years, but he was ready for things that I wasn't. We split up and my drinking took on a new form once I was living alone. My coworkers and I would go out for drinks after work.

At 25, I had a really bad accident at a friend's house. We were with a group of friends at a bbq & I'd been drinking beer for most of the day. By nightfall, I was pretty loaded. I decided to climb this cinder block wall that was in her backyard. It was about a nine-foot cinder block wall and once I got up there, the wall crumbled. I fell in a very weird way and shattered my C1 vertebrae. I almost died from drinking.

Six weeks after that accident, I was back at work - neck brace and all. And here enters my drinking home alone. So instead of going out to bars, now I'm drinking at home because nobody wants to be with a girl at a bar with a neck brace. At that point, most of the people that I was friends with decided that I really wasn't that fun to be around anymore. I mean, if I wasn't at work, I was either hungover or drunk. The fact that I almost died from drinking wasn't enough to make me stop.

Again, I had a group of friends that left me. I had a boyfriend that left me. One of those friends was my roommate, so I had to find a house. I had to find living situations, so moved out on my own again. So there's a pattern here of alcohol getting me in trouble. I'm losing things and so I'm running away to something else.

I met my current partner towards the end of 2016 and it started out as a rebound. He's really shown a limelight to my behavior because he wasn't a big drinker. So I was drinking and I was starting to lie about it. Starting to hide bottles and sneak around. Now I'm lying and trying the whole moderation thing, which is just torture for me. I was spending the week obsessing about when I could drink.Then on the weekend I was drinking anywhere from two to four bottles of wine a night.

The last time I drank was October 27th, 2017. I had a complete mental breakdown. Don't remember really any of it. I think I had drank about four bottles of wine that night. Breaking my phone, saying a lot of mean things to my boyfriend. It was just a really bad night. I remember waking up and my partner was just devastated. This was it. I was 32 years old. My life was just this same story on repeat over and over and over again. If I don't take alcohol out of my life, I'm going to lose everything.

So I quit and I don't know how I did it. I was so scared. Asking myself questions like, "How am I going to clean my house?" I used to drink wine when I was doing chores. It was so ingrained in everything that I did and I was just absolutely terrified.

I had not gotten to the point where I was waking up and drinking. I've always kept a job. Always been successful at work and so I could get through the day pretty okay. It's when I got home I had to be super, super intentional. When I quit drinking, I also decided to do the whole 30 meal plan things. For the first month I was super obsessed with food as well. I think that helped. It was hard, don't get me wrong, but I think it helped in a way because it wasn't just the alcohol.

Worried you might find yourself saying I almost died from drinking? Start reading This Naked Mind today and learn how to gain control! https://www.thisnakedmind.com/book

Listen to the complete podcast to hear how Shelley went from saying I almost died from drinking to living a Naked Life!